When is Enough Enough?

I recently read a book recommended by one of my daughters, “Affluence with Abundance,” by  James Suzman.  The author did an intensive study of the vanishing world of the bushmen in southern Africa.

Viewed by the western world as a society lacking all the great benefits of our modern culture, the author notes:

“...hunters-gatherers appeared to be content – in fact, to thrive…with a limited material culture.  Their approach to well-being…was based on having few material wants, and those few wants were easily met with limited technologies and not too much effort. “

So unlike our western culture where we seem to want more and more,

more

he noted that

“…hunter-gatherers were content by the simple expedient of not desiring more than they already had….they were content because they did not hold themselves hostage to unattainable aspirations.”

What an idea!  To be content by not desiring more than we already have.  That seems to be a totally foreign idea to most of us.   Instead of not being held hostage by desiring things we really cannot afford, we use that magical plastic that gives us now what will take months, maybe years to pay for.  Many items we purchase on credit are out of fashion or used up before they are even paid for.

more 3

As my husband and I have downsized in preparation to moving to a smaller home for our retirement years, I realize how much I have been guilty of that “more and more” mentality.  As I have given things away to family and friends and sold much on the web, I keep asking myself “why did I think I needed that?”

And, of course, for much of my “stuff” the answer is I did not “need” it, I just “wanted” it.

more 2

While there is certainly nothing wrong with buying something just because I want it, I do think I went way over board in many areas.

I do ask myself what if I had bought less of what I wanted but did not need and gave that money to missions, to the local food pantry, to helping others about me more in need.

“Don’t hoard treasure down here where it gets eaten by moths and corroded by rust or—worse!—stolen by burglars. Stockpile treasure in heaven, where it’s safe from moth and rust and burglars. It’s obvious, isn’t it? The place where your treasure is, is the place you will most want to be, and end up being.”   Matthew 19:19-21

Looking at my home, my possessions, my credit card statement, my check book I have to ask myself:

Where is my treaure?

more 5

 

Taking a Last Walk Through My Garden

 

Today we put our house on the market.  It has been  a busy few months as we began the process of downsizing preparing to move from a nine-room house to something much smaller.

My experience in this process of deciding what to keep and what to sell, give away or throw out has been an interesting one.   Döstädning – Death Cleaning

At times I have felt relief as I began to see the freedom I would have when I did not have to spend so much time cleaning and dusting and moving “stuff” around.  Relief as I look forward to the day my washer and dryer is on the same living level and I do not have to climb up and downstairs to do the laundry.  (Or, in my case, my dear husband does not have to do that.)

Other times I have felt some sorrow as I parted with items I have enjoyed over the years.  But how many Isabel Blooms can one house have?  (For my readers who are not familiar with Isabel Bloom, check out their website at isbloom.com

Perhaps the thing I will miss the most is my garden.  This garden was built by my husband with love for me.  The Garden that Love Built

It has been so much fun to watch this garden grow from a couple of trees and a few hostas plants until now the entire back yard is one beautiful garden.

Downsizing and moving to a smaller place was what we originally had planned.  However, in the middle of these plans our youngest daughter who lives with her family nearby announced they are moving to another state for a job opportunity for her.

Although we have six children (one is deceased), 20 grandchildren (three are deceased) and our ninth great grandchild is on his way, our children are scattered all over the states.  Missouri, West Virginia, Illinois, South Carolina and Michigan.  This daughter was the only child near us.  So – moving to a smaller place suddenly has taken on a harder decision.

Where do we go?  At our age we do not want to live without any family nearby.  Which child gets the blessing (or the curse) of having us live close by?  ♥

As we begin the process of deciding exactly where we will call home it is a stressful time hoping to find a place we will really love.  But it is also an exciting time as we look forward to a new home and making new friends.

I remember the words found in Proverbs 3:5-6:

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding.  In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will direct your path.

I will trust you Lord!

 

 

 

Saying Goodbye to Lizzie

That time has come!

That time when I realize that I do not want to spend the last years of my life dusting all the “stuff” I have accumulated over the years.

That time when I realize I do not want to spend the last years of my life cleaning floors in rooms I no longer need or use.

That time when I realize I do not want to wash windows in rooms I no longer need or use.

In other words, the time has come to downsize!

downsizing 2

Posting items on local swap sites I have been a little unsure as people purchased my “stuff” and the house has become more empty each day.  But after a few items were gone, my house suddenly felt so much bigger and so much less cluttered.  As each item sells I begin to feel like a weight has been removed from my shoulder.

I have had little trouble parting from the extra furniture, the deep freeze I was no longer using, the extra bedroom furniture I no longer need.

But when it came to looking through my many bookshelves filled with books, I must confess I have had a moment of sorrow.  Over the years I have collected biographies of presidents, first ladies, and people who played a role in our American history such as our founding fathers (and mothers), senators, generals and other famous political persons.  All of them I have read at least once – and most two or three times.  It is like saying goodbye to old, dear friends.

books

But one item I am parting with has little or no resale value.  I would probably have a hard time even giving it to anyone except for someone who knows its history and loves it too.

It is my garden frog, Lizzie.

DSCF0005(1)

Named after my grandmother, Martha Elizabeth, this little cement frog stood guard in my Grandmother’s garden for years.  Grandma loved flowers.  When I was a little girl I loved the plants in her yard  with their big beautiful green leaves that looked like their name “elephant ears.”

elephant ears

Remembering her elephant ears plants perhaps that is why I have loved my hosta garden because of the huge leaves many of these plants have.DSCF0046

Grandma slowly lost her eyesight to glaucoma and had to get rid of her flowers.  That was a sad day for her.

I am not even sure how I came to the be the grandchild that got Grandma’s frog.  But I have treasured it.

One reason is that I inherited her love of flowers and I feel a connection to her through the flower garden and little Lizzie.

But also because Grandma was the only one of my grandparents who I felt loved me.  Grandpa (her husband) had died years before I was born so I never had the chance to know him.  My other grandparents never showed me any sign of affection.  I cannot remember ever getting a hug or hearing them say they loved me.  Going to their house my parents always told me to say hello to them and then go sit down and be very quiet.

But my flower grandma always made me feel not only loved, but special.  Like her I was a redhead and she was proud of that.  As she began to lose her eyesight she would have me stand in the doorway where the sun would shine on my hair so she could see the red hair.  She also had me played the piano for her when I came over.  Just learning how to play, I am not sure how good it really was but Grandma always praised me.

Scan_Pic0005

But in downsizing to a smaller home with a smaller yard, I will no longer have a place for Lizzie.

So what to do with Lizzie?

Perfect answer:  my daughter, Rebekah.  She, like Grandma and like me, loves flowers and gardens.  While I will miss Lizzie, I am content knowing she will be loved and treasured by the fourth generation.

Enjoy your new home, Lizzie!

 

 

Döstädning – Death Cleaning

clutter

I have been “death cleaning” but did not realize it!

Over the years I have watched my friends fret as they anticipated turning 30, 40, 50 or 60.  I never understood why they got so up tight.  To me those milestones were just another birthday.

But this spring I turn 70 and that is a milestone I find hard to accept.

70 2

70 – I can no longer count myself in the middle age group.  I’m old!

Thinking about this milestone in my life I have found myself looking around at all my “stuff” accumulated over the years and suddenly it just seems like too much “stuff.”  I have had an irresistible urge to clean house – to declutter.

While I certainly expect to live many more years I have looked around and thought:

Why am I hanging on to stuff I no longer need, want or use?

Why leave all this for my children to have to sort through deciding who gets what.  Or, what is really more likely, to not want any of it but feel guilty putting it in a yard sale or toting off to Goodwill?

Since my kids are grown, why do I need so many pots and pans, so many dishes?

Since it is now just my husband and me, do I really need two televisions, four recliners?

Talking to my husband he agreed that it is time to clean house, to declutter.  My daughter says I sound like a pregnant woman who is nesting just before her baby comes.

So we have started going through our home and making decisions.

clutter2

We have listed several items on the local swap websites and have been able to sell several items.

Our garage is full of boxes all ready to be priced and sorted for our community yard sale this spring.

clutter-clipart-8

While I thought this was just my own unique experience I found out recently that there is a new book being published this month by Margareta Magnusson called The Gentle Art of Swedish Death Cleaning.  Translated from the Swedish döstädning the concept is not a negative focus on death.  It is just recognizing that maybe you should start shedding the baggage of life rather than leave it for your children to deal with.

Also – and this is where I am right now – having too much “stuff” can raise stress levels as you age and do not have the energy to keep it all looking neat and in order.

Besides, while I still have a lot of good years ahead, I realize there are more years behind me than ahead and I want to enjoy every minute of those remaining.

Instead of spending time and energy dusting, cleaning, I want to:

dance and enjoy fun times with my husband

dancing old c

 

enjoy some road trips

road trips

and spend some romantic evenings just enjoying being together and watching the sun set.

pearls.jpg

So – as I begin this death cleaning, I find I am already feeling much better – somehow freer to enjoy the years ahead.

So sorry kids!  Besides spending all our money on those road trips, now you find out there won’t be much else left in the house when we bite the dust!

kids