He May Regret the Rule He Made

Those of you who follow my blog know that my husband and I are Scrabble addicts.  We are very competitive and our final scores are often very close.

Recently I beat my husband by just 15 points.  He decided he wanted to add the scores again to make sure no mistake had been made.  While I was more than glad to do this, I said to be fair if we were going to check the scores of this game, we would need to check those games where I lost by just 15 points.

So I agreed with his new rule.  Going forward any game where there was a difference of 20 points or less, we would add up the scores again.

He may regret making that rule.

This week we played a game and when it ended he was ahead of me by just five points.  I insisted he check the scores again.

To his great disappointment he found that he had made an addiction mistake in his score giving him ten more points than he should have.

By subtracting those ten points, I now won the game by just five points.

So be careful what you want to change – it may turn against you.

(And I’m still laughing at this!)

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My Little Composer

Years ago my father sometimes held revivals in small churches in southern Illinois.  Many of the churches either had no piano player (this was before the era of drums and guitars in worship) or a very untalented player.  Since he felt music was important for sharing the gospel, he came up with a solution.

He would give his daughter piano lessons and she could go with him to play at these services.

I was excited to learn to play.  Unlike most piano students who start with music books like “John Thompson’s Modern Course for the Piano,” my book was an old hymnbook.

 

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The first song I learned to play was an OLD hymn called “When I See the Blood.”  It was written in the key of “C” with no sharps or flats and a good place to start for a beginner where I could just play on the “white” keys.

After 10 months of lessons I was quite adept at playing all the songs in the hymnbook.  My teacher said I was the best student she had ever had and she wanted to teach me classical music.  I was so excited as I started this course of study.

Shortly after a few lessons in this new genre, my father felt learning classical music was money wasted.  He wanted someone to play in church.  Who needed to know how to play Bach or Beethoven?

Although I had no more lessons as a child, I continued to study on my own and took more lessons as an adult.

My music has been such a blessing to me – and I hope to others.

When I have experienced great “highs” and great “lows” in my life, music has been a release.  I can play lively show tunes or songs of praise in times of great joy.  When I have experienced times of distress or sorrow, music has also been a place of comfort.

Now I am enjoying one of the greatest joys of my musical experience.  My little granddaughter has a love for music and for the piano.  A few months ago I started giving her lessons.  Her parents say they never have to tell her practice – she loves to play and needs no prompting to play.

What is so sweet – last week she decided to become a composer.  She has a lot of stuffed animals she calls the wolf pack and she is writing a song for them.  “The Theme of the Wolf Pack.”  Not only is she writing the music – she also has words to go with the music.

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She is not quite ready to draw the lines and the actual notes so she has just written the letter of the note and has specified in some cases if it is the right or the left hand that plays the note.  She also has a repeat bar at the end so you can go back and play for the second verse she has yet to write.

It thrills this old grandma’s heart to be able to share this love of music and pass on a little of my own knowledge to the next generation.

Who knows?  Maybe some day she will write songs of worship for her generation to praise the Lord!

 

 

 

 

 

The Day I Let My Pain Go!

Thirty-eight years ago my beloved husband and father of my two daughters was killed in an accident.  Only those who have suffered the loss of a loved one know what sorrow I felt.

In that first moment when I realized I was a widow at 33 with two little girls to raise, the first thing I did was cry out to God.  Since a small girl I have based my life on my faith in Jesus Christ so it was only natural that my first thoughts were “God help me!”

Immediately a verse from the Bible came to my mind.

“I am with you always, even to the end of the age.”

In the days and weeks ahead God gave me the strength and courage I needed to make so many decisions.

Things I had never thought about:

  • What funeral home do I use?
  • Where do I bury him?
  • Will I have enough money for the expenses?
  • How will I provide for my girls on my one income?
  • How far will his life insurance go?
  • Since I have to keep working, who will watch my girls before/after school?
  • Do I continue to live where I am or move closer to family for support?
  • What do I do with all his clothes, his guns, his personal stuff?

But the biggest decision was “how do I get through a day without him?”

While everyone talked about how strong I was, only God knew how many times I fell to my knees and cried out for strength.  One of my friends had recently recorded this song, “Praise the Lord,” and when I felt I could not go on, I would play this song and as I began praising the Lord, peace would come once again.

 

But slowly, as the months, then the years went by the burden of my grief became almost more than I could bear.  While the love for my husband did not diminish, I confess I became very lonely.  The idea of all the years stretching ahead of me with no one to share them with me became almost overwhelming.

I began to entertain the thought of finding a new love.  Yet, I felt so terrible even thinking such a thing.

One Sunday in service the speaker sang an old song “Take My Hand Precious Lord.”  The lyrics expressed exactly how I felt.

“Precious Lord, take my hand, lead me on, let me stand.  I am tired, I am weak, I am worn.”

After the song was finished, the speaker invited anyone who was struggling with a burden to come to the altar for a joint prayer with the church.  While I definitely wanted prayer, I did not want to walk to the front of the church – too embarrassing.  As I sat in my seat debating what to do, a old friend of the family who was sitting in the very front of the church got up, walked back to me, held out his hand and invited me to walk to the front with him.  How could I say no when my heart was crying out for relief of this burden of grief?

At the altar I quietly asked God to please take this burden of grief from me.  I could not go on year after year like this.  It suddenly came to me that God could give me peace, but I had to be willing to let go of my grief.  Like a light bulb going off, I realized that I was holding tight to my sorrow because I felt that was all I had left of my husband.  To be willing to stop grieving, to be willing to laugh and love again, I had to “let it go.”

Praying to God to help me, I felt as if a heavy load had been lifted from my shoulders.

I felt the peace of God that passes understanding fill my heart.

Did I quit missing my husband?  Of course not.  Even today I cannot see a young man fishing without seeing my husband with his fishing pole slung over his shoulder.  I cannot see a police officer without seeing my husband in his uniform as a prison guard.

Did I quit loving my husband?  Of course not.  I treasure his memory and look forward to seeing him again some day in the next life.

But I was able to finally understand that constantly grieving, being filled with sorrow was not how he would have wanted me to live.  He would want his memory to bring a smile and he would want me to live and laugh again.

I let my pain go – and accepted the peace Jesus offered me.

Another song I now love to hear that says it so well:

And if there’s one thing I know, it’s that you were never left alone ‘Cause you can always count on Jesus’ name.  And if there’s one thing I pray it’s that Jesus helps you find a way to make a change and listen to your heart.  God will take away your pain if you choose to let it go, if there’s one thing I know.”

By this post I do not mean to sound like Pollyanna and to those who are suffering unbearable grief, I know it is not an easy thing.  But I do hope you will seek the peace of God and allow Him to help you.

 

I Am the Champion!

Well I did it!  I won the last Scrabble game of 2019 – making me the champion!

My last post told the tale of my husband’s effort to catch me.

Today is His Last Chance

 

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My husband did his best – but couldn’t catch me.  He tells me he is now depressed.  (A joke only – he’s fine.)

But guess what his New Year’s Resolution is?  You got it!

To beat me in 2020.

Happy New Year to all my readers!

Today is His Last Chance

Those of you who have followed my posts for awhile know that my husband and I are Scrabble addicts.  We play with a super scrabble board.  It has more spaces for words than a regular Scrabble board and 200 tiles instead of 100.

We have kept a record of our scores since 2008 and are very competitive.

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As we come to the last day of 2019 I am one game ahead of my husband.  He is determined to end this year with a tie between us as we did last year.

So this evening we will play our last game of the year.

If he wins and we end in a tie – all is well.

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I did it!

But if I win – I will end the year two games ahead.

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Champion!!!!

Of course, you know I’m rooting to win and be the champion for 2019.  However, if the last two games are any indication of how it will go – I’m nervous.   Most of the time our scores are very close but the last two games he has not only won but beat me by over 150 points.  NO!

In our game last night he had three seven-letter words.  For those of you who don’t play Scrabble playing all of your letters in one turn adds 50 extra points to your score.  NO!

The game tonight will be our 829th game since we started keeping scores.  This year we played 136 games.  My husband has figured out that if we play 171 games in 2020 we will reach 1000 games.

So – while I am sure I will at some point today or tomorrow be more serious about goals for 2020 – for now that seems like a worthy goal.

Think we can make it to 1000 games in the coming year?

Think I can win the game tonight and be the champion?

We still see.

For all my readers, Happy New Year!  May the coming year bring you God’s peace and joy!

 

 

 

Papa Can Fix Anything!

My husband has a big reputation to live up to.

A few years ago our youngest granddaughter was given a beautiful carousel.  As she watched the beautiful colors and the animals go round and round she could not resist reaching out and touching them.  In the process, she broke one of them and the carousel would not work.

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Her mother and father both tried to fix it, but could not.  But she was not worried.  She told them to take it to Papa because “Papa can fix anything.”

When my husband got the carousel he knew he had to fix it because he could not disappoint the faith in him that this little girl had.

However, in his attempt to fix the carousel, he actually broke another one of the animals and now he had not one, but two errors on the carousel.

What to do?

He first went on line and tried to find the company that made the carousel to see if they had replacement parts or instructions on how to repair it.  While the company still was in business, they no longer made the original carousel  and had no replacement parts or instructions on how to repair it.

He then began calling all the repair shops, the jewelry stores, any place he thought might be able to help him.

After several weeks of trying to find someone to repair the carousel he saw an ad for a store that sold and repaired watches and clocks.  The store was in a small town some 30 miles north of our home.  Quickly he drove to the store with the carousel.  What a relief when the owner said he could repair it!

My husband was so glad he left the carousel with the owner without even asking what it would cost.

A couple of weeks later he got a call that the carousel was fixed.  The price tag was much higher than he had anticipated – but what price can be placed on a little girl’s faith in you.

It was worth all the effort and every penny as we watch her each Christmas still be so enchanted by the lights, the music and the animals turning round and round.

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And of course, she had to buy Papa a cup to declare how true it is that “Papa can fix anything.”

 

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This Day Changed Everything

Several years ago on this day (I will not say how many – that’s for my daughter to tell) I became a mother for the first time.

What an awesome moment – the moment I held her in my arms.

I whispered to her how we were going to be such good friends.  We had books to read, flowers to pick, songs to sing and so much more!  What dreams I had for her.

Today as I look at my “little” girl who is now herself not only a mother, but a grandmother, I still see the little girl in her eyes.

As we have walked through life together, we have experienced both joy and sorrow.  We have laughed and cried together and a few times even argued with each other.  But through it all one thing has remained strong – our love for one another.

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Growing old myself, looking back on my life I think how I have never been famous or accomplished any great achievement.

Then I look at this daughter – a school teacher, who really loves her students and I see how many lives she has touched.  How many children came to love learning because of her interest and love for them.  How many children experienced for the first time a sense of their own ability because of her encouragement to them.  How many parents she has helped understand how to help their own children.

I see the beautiful hats she knits for each student at Valentine’s Day, the fleece blankets she has given to many at Christmas.  The hats she knits for cancer survivors.  The homeless she has fed.

If I had even a small part in helping her to become the caring person she is – then I have achieved much!

Today, on her birthday, I share some quotes about mothers/daughters that I love.

  • “A daughter is just a little girl who grows up to be your best friend.” – Unknown
  • “Mother and daughter never truly part, maybe in distance but never in heart.” – Unknown
  • “Someday when the pages of my life end, I know that you will be one of the most beautiful chapters.” – Unknown
  • “A daughter is the happy memories of the past, the joyful moments of the present, and the hope and promise of the future.” – Unknown
  • A daughter is God’s way of saying, ‘thought you could use a lifelong friend.’” – Unknown
  • A mother’s treasure is her daughter.” – Catherine Pulsifer

And just in case she reads this blog today – here’s one for you, Beka Boo

  • “What’s it like to have the greatest daughter in the world? I don’t know ask your grandmother.” – Unknown